


The Birthday Present

by Visionsofdazzlingrooms



Category: Columbo, blue bloods
Genre: Airplanes, Birthday Present, Columbo - Freeform, Cross Over, Danny didn’t know any better, F/M, Italy, Mike high club, Vacation, airplane bathroom - Freeform, answers an ‘I wonder’ question, birthday present gone wrong, but Linda’s alive, course you knew that by now, don’t ask me how this came to be, fellow Italian, fellow police man, post season eight
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:55:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27657164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Visionsofdazzlingrooms/pseuds/Visionsofdazzlingrooms
Summary: The date? June 27th. The year? 2019. The occasion? Linda’s birthday. Danny gets his wife a birthday present he’s been wanting to get her for years. With the help of the family, including Jamie’s new wife, he gets the present. Little did he know it wouldn’t go over as well as he initially thought....Thankfully, Danny Reagan always had a plan with multiple steps and adjustments.
Relationships: Danny Reagan/Linda Reagan, Lieutenant Columbo/Mrs. Columbo
Comments: 22
Kudos: 7





	1. I Had A Fear Of Flying

**Author's Note:**

> This all came about because, a few nights ago, I thought, “I wonder if Linda now has a fear of flying?” 
> 
> Also, this was (mostly) written prior to my new knowledge of medivacs and who can and cannot fly on them. Thank you Hellfire32 for pointing this out. Now I’m even more mad and disappointed at the Blue Bloods writers. 
> 
> (Nurses do not fly on helicopters in New York. Kevin Wade and company really said F-You to the fans and Amy. Okay, I’m done ranting)

Linda sighed as she made herself lunch that June twenty seventh. In ten days, she'd be a year older. She was turning one year older, but she felt like she had lived ten more years than she had. Her back hurt more often than not, her knees hurt, and her shoulder hurt. She sounded so old when she told the family she needed to sit for at least ten minutes. Two good things came from her horrific accident: Danny's love for her grew stronger, of that was even possible, and he was learning how to cook. On Saturdays and Sundays, he helped Linda with the food, so now he could cook pork, ground beef (except meatballs), and all the potato sides the family liked. Linda was so glad he was learning to cook- it made her job so much easier, and she found it hilarious that Danny burned the outside of the meatballs, but undercooked the insides. 

Linda smiled when she felt familiar arms around her waist. "Hi, honey."

"Hey," Danny kissed her neck. "Whatcha Makin'?"

"Grilled Ham and cheese. Want one?"

"Sure."

Linda giggled as Danny continued kissing her neck. "Danny." 

"I've got you something," he pulled away and turned to the kitchen table. 

"My birthday isn't until next week," she plated her sandwich, coming to sit at the table. 

"It's an early present." He puts an envelope on the wood table. 

"What's this?" Linda picked up the envelope.

"You'll have to open it." Danny smiled widely in anticipation. 

She slid the ribbon off the envelope, then tore it open. Two similar pieces of paper fell into her hand, and she felt her heart rate pick up speed. "These are plane tickets."

"Yeah. To Italy. You've always wanted to go."

"We're going by plane?" She slowly started backing away. 

Danny was confused, "yeah. We weren't going to drive. I suppose we could've taken a cruise, but that was way more expensive."

"I- I can't- can't go." She dropped the tickets onto the table. 

"Why not? You've always told me you'd love to see Italy, and now that you can, you don't wanna go? That-" he stopped mid ramble, watching Linda sit at the table slowly. The reason hit him like a ton of bricks. "Makes total sense." 

Danny sat down next to Linda, grabbing her hand atop the table. "Honey, I'm sorry. I didn't realize- that is, I didn't know-"

"It's okay, Danny. You couldn't have known. I do wanna go, really I do. It's just..." Linda shook her head, feeling tears start to well. She hated how often she cried nowadays due to the depression and anxiety that flared up after the crash. Tears started slipping down her cheeks, "damn."

"Don't cry. What are you crying?"

"I don't know!" 

"I can return the tickets, cash 'em in or something."

"Just... let me think about it?" She wiped the short lived tears off her cheeks. 

"Sure. The flight's Tuesday."

Linda nodded, chewing her lip, deciding what she wanted to do. 

***********

"Danny?" Linda walked into the living room where Danny was trying to fix the tv on Monday. She had to make a decision now, because the tickets would be useless after tomorrow. 

"What is it, babe?" 

"I think we can take that flight to Italy."

He looked over his shoulder at her, "really?"

"As long as you knock me out first."

"Knock you out?" He stood up, walking over to her. 

"Give me some sleeping pills or something. I don't think I could survive without some sort of sedative." 

Danny nodded, "we can pick something up at the store." He rubbed her arm subconsciously. It seemed like these days he was rubbing her arm or back just as an excuse to be close to her. 

"Okay. Thank you. Let's go pack? What's the temperature in Italy in the summer anyways?"

"We'll look that up," he steered her to the stairs, happy she had agreed to go.

**********

Linda sat on the inner seat, away from the window. She had camomile tea in one thermos by her foot, and cold water in the other thermos by the other foot. Her shoulder length hair curtained around her face, hiding herself from the terror of flying. 

Danny pushed her hair behind her ear and gave her cheek a gentle kiss. He pried her fingers from the seat and laced his through hers, holding her hand. "Take off's always rough, but it'll be nice once we're in the air."

"How is an acrophobic person like yourself completely okay with this?"

"You don't get a choice when you're in the military."

"Oh. I hadn't thought of that."

"Here," Danny reached in the small bag next to him on the floor. He pulled out her cooling eye mask. "Wear this, and try to sleep. Want to listen to some music?"

Linda nodded and dug out her phone and head phones. She clicked on her Relaxing Music playlist, and let the smooth sound of Frank Sinatra lull her into a fake calming state. She could do this.

"That's my girl," Danny kissed her cheek again, saying a quick prayer she'd make it through the flight. 

*********

Nasty turbulence woke Linda from her foggy haze. It was a wonder what music could do for her. She gripped the arm rest and the seat tightly, biting her lip. Before she could register her words, she exclaimed hoarsely, "Danny!" Her hand grabbed his arm, her red nails digging into his skin. 

"What? What's the matter?" He had been pulled from his own world, imaging how nice it would be to take strolls on the warm beach as the sunset. "Honey?"

"What's happening?"

"Turbulence. It's just wind."

"That's moving the f***ing plane!"

Danny felt temporarily hopeless. In order for Linda to use the f-word, she had to be very upset. He held her hand and reached for the blanket wedged between them. 

The blanket felt warm against her legs, but she wasn't going to feel calmed just by the soft fabric. Her knuckles were turning white as she gripped the arm rest. She wanted to puke and scream and maybe just die, so she could be off this infernal contraption. 

Linda's eyes popped open and her head shot up, whipping to the side to look at her husband. 

Danny only smiled as his hand rubbed her upper thigh. "Be quiet, or the first thing I'll do when we land is spank you."

When were they going to learn that spanking was no longer threatening? Linda only nodded, though, curling her toes in her sandals.


	2. A Relaxing Time With The Reagans

Linda's eyes fluttered closed as Danny's fingers trailed her thigh. Why had she decided to wear a sundress onto the plane? Why hadn't she worn that cute tank top and Jean shorts? Her underwear was the only barrier between Danny's fingers and paradise. He rubbed her atop the underwear, causing a monstrous friction against her sensitive ball of nerves. Never in her life did she imagine they would join the mile high club, but here they were, and she was relieved for the very welcomed distraction. 

Danny leaned closer to her, and nibbled her earlobe, something he knew she loved immensely. He rubbed harder as he whispered, "do you want it?"

"Dammit, Danny. We're in a plane!" Her voice conveyed annoyance, but her face conveyed arousal. Her cheeks were starting to flush pink as her tense shoulders started to slump further into relaxation. 

"You'll just have to be real quiet." He kissed that spot on her neck that never failed to drive her crazy. 

"Ohhhh....."

"Do you want it?" He repeated, sending shivers through her body.

She nodded, reverting to the 'Yes, Danny' game. "Yes, Danny."

He smirked and slipped his fingers inside her cotton panties. He was surprised to feel how aroused she already was within those eight or ten minutes. "Linda."

She bit her lip, her hand moving from the armrest to grip the soft blue blanket. Her breath was now coming out long and deep, and it took everything in her not to shift and sink further onto the familiar finger. 

Danny curled his finger inside her, loving the strangled moans that escaped her lips. She was trying so very hard to appear normal, but was failing somewhat miserably. He kissed her jaw bone, adding another finger inside her. She hissed and temporarily stiffened, but immediately became relaxed. He scissored his fingers inside her, shifting in his own seat, starting to feel his arousal. 

"Danny," Linda lifted herself about an inch off the seat before sinking back down, forcing her husband's fingers higher inside her. She was close, so close. "I'm gonna..."

Danny nodded and all too soon were his fingers gone from her. He brought them up to his lips and sucked off the juices, getting a mangled 'squee' from his wife. "I'm going to the bathroom. When you feel like it, you come in too. I'll make sure you're completely relaxed." He cupped her cheek, bringing her lips to his. 

Linda's head swam as Danny's tongue massaged hers. As her hand made its way over to his thighs, he pulled away, and stood to go to the bathroom. She was left so painfully aroused with the taste of herself inside her own mouth. She barely waited long enough to get up in order to make it look like she wasn't about to have sex in an airplane bathroom. 

Linda adjusted her skirt and panties beneath the blanket, hoping nothing was evident. The rest of the passengers seemed too interested in their own activities, whether it was their phones or the in flight movie. Linda waited five minutes, rubbing her thighs together to keep that arousal, until she tossed the blanket aside and strode to the bathroom. Quietly, she knocked, "it's me, babe."

"Finally," Danny said before opening the door and yanking her inside. "What took you so long?"

"I had to make sure it didn't look suspicious. What would they think if I just up and followed you to the bathroom?"

Danny wrapped his arms around her, "they'd think I have a beautiful wife who needs a little help relaxing."

"You better hurry up, I'm starting to feel anxious again."

"Yes, ma'am." His lips attached to hers as his hands slid down her back to cup her ass. He massaged the flesh, bringing her impossibly closer to him. 

Linda's eyes nearly rolled to the back of her head when she felt Danny's arousal against her thigh. She tilted her head when his lips found her neck, and popped the button open to his tight jeans. As her skirt slow rose up her legs and passed her bottom, she pulled the jeans zipper down. 

Linda's hand darted beneath the T-shirt Danny wore, her fingers dipping in the valleys of his muscles. Gosh, she loved his body. Her hands moved to his back, and dipped into the Jeans waistband. She nipped at his lips as her hands slid beneath his underwear, mimicking the motions he used against her butt. 

Danny moaned her name as his fingers quickly made work of the buttons in the front of her dress. She nearly hit him in the nose as she tugged her arms away from the pink straps of the dress. Her bra was unceremoniously pushed up her chest, and he sloppily attached his lips to a hard nipple. He used one hand to massage the other breast, and the other dove past her skirt and into her underwear. 

"Danny!" Linda's head lolled to the side, hitting the door or the wall beside her. 

"Shh," he reminded her, pinching her thigh. 

Linda moved her hands across her husband's hips, tracing his well sculpted V-line. She smirked when he moaned against her wet nipple. As her fingers danced above his hardening length, he switched to her other breast, and rubbed at her even harder. 

"Danny," Linda moaned again, barely keeping her voice at a whisper. 

"Quiet, babe." Without warning, he twirled them around and lifted Linda onto the small counter around the smaller sink. Quickly her underwear was discarded, as was his pants and underwear. 

For a while, Danny just kissed Linda heavily, his tongue foreshadowing the thrusts he was going to take inside her. Linda's breath was getting heavier and her moans louder and more frequent. She was close, and all she needed to achieve happiness was him inside her. "I need yo-OU!"

He had thrust into her- hard. So hard her voice went up an octave and about two decibles. So much for keeping quiet... at least she had a good spanking awaiting her at the hotel. Her ass hurt just thinking about it. 

"Cum for me, Linda," Danny huskily whispered in her ear after a few minutes. "Come on, make it good."

She didn't want the whole airplane to hear, she didn't want some nice, concerned elderly lady hobbling back here to ask if everything was alright, she didn't want.... She wanted it, damn, she wanted it. She was close, but she held off. 

"C'mon, baby," Danny egged her on, adding his hand where they were conjoined. He rubbed her hard, watching her face relax further and feeling her muscles tighten.

"I can't... not here, not now...." 

One pinch. One pinch was all it took for Linda to become undone. She called out his name until his lips smacked over hers, drowning her cries. It took another minute or so for him to find his release. 

Linda's breathing was still uneven, but she managed to kiss every inch of the side of Danny's neck. When she reached his lips, she whispered, "thank you."

"For?"

"For helping me relax."


	3. Italian Hotel Room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Italian in this chapter is from Google translate. I am not a native Italian speaker, nor am I an American who happens to also speak Italian. Sincerest apologies if I have gotten it wrong

Going back to their seats was a task in and of itself. They had to leave at different times, just to dispel any suspicions as they could. Danny made it back to his seat without many questioning looks. He seemed perfectly normal- dark jeans, black tee... what was so suspicious about that?

Linda had a harder time, however. She had to make sure her frizzy, messy hair looked presentable (so much for the cute curls she had styled), her dress wasn't completely the wrinkled mess it was when Danny left, and she had to walk normally, which was the hardest of them all. She received many questioning looks as she made her way back to her seat. 

For the rest of the flight, Linda was relaxed. She actually fell asleep for most of the duration of the flight, and was only awakened by Danny who informed her the plane was landing. 

They didn't talk while they walked off the plane, or when they entered the airport. As they stood at the baggage claim, Linda sighed and decided to break the silence. "So that wasn't as terrible as I thought."

Danny chuckled, "the flight back oughta be more interesting."

Linda bit her lip once again, "it better be.... I suppose I deserve that threatening spanking?"

"Is this going to be a repeat of the honeymoon? Where we only see the outside world for five minutes?"

Linda laughed as Danny handed her her suitcase. "We'll see more of the world than that! I wanna do everything! The gondolas, the beaches, the pasta!"

Danny laughed and swung an arm around her shoulders, guiding her out of the airport. 

**********

"Oh, Danny! It's beautiful!" Linda smiled widely at the hotel room... no, hotel suite. It had a big sitting room with a balcony view. The bed was raised onto the "second level", and looked oh-so-comfy. 

Linda headed to the bathroom, just wanting to explore the entire suite. "There's a claw foot tub! Danny!" She smiled widely as she walked out of the bathroom suite. "How the hell are we able to afford this?"

"With the help of the family."

"Then we'll have to buy them gifts!"

"Come ti piace la tua stanza?" The bellhop asked the married couple. 

"È meraviglioso! Grazie!" Linda responded, making Danny smile. 

The bellhop smiled and nodded, handing Danny the key. The detective took it and stuffed it in his pocket, leaving the bellhop to hold out his hand. 

"Thanks," Danny told him in English. 

"Pay the man, sweetie," Linda said, focusing on the Italian paintings hanging on the walls. 

"Oh, uh..." Danny dug into his pocket for some money. "Uh, lo siento. Este americano."

"That's Spanish, Danny," The blonde slightly scolded as she turned back to stand next to him. She watched the bellhop leave nonetheless. 

"That's the only other language I know. Unlike you."

"Danny, you know Arabic."

"You're right. It's been so long, I forgot I could speak it. But you speaking Italian..."

"I know you like it. Who knew that the Italian forced down my throat would stick and become helpful?"

"English, Spanish, and Italian. What's next? German?"

"I can sing the first full verse of Silent Night entirely in German."

"That's cause we watch The Muppets!"

"It doesn't matter," Linda walked to the glass doors of the balcony. "What matters is that we have a week and a half here. New things to explore and see and eat!"

"New room to mark our territory." Danny gestured to the room, catching the orange Linda tossed at him. 

"Grow up."

"I am grown up," he walked over to her. "I'm a grown man."

"And you better gimme some grown man."

"Am I Gonna have to listen to your New Kids references all throughout this trip?"

Linda paused, tilting her head and looking to the ceiling. "Yes."

"Then I guess Imma give you some grown man."

Linda smiled broadly and dragged Danny to the bed. They made love, enjoying each other in the most intimate way. 

*********

"Linda, I'm hungry," Danny told her as they laid in bed after round two of sex. 

"For me?" She adjusted the blankets to barely cover her nipples. 

"I hate you, and yes and no."

"No?" Linda sat up, the blankets falling to her lap. "Whaddaya mean no?"

Danny sat up as well, "I mean I wanna hear you order room service for us in Italian."

"Oh. Okay, I'm hungry for some food. Whaddaya want?" She reached into the night stand drawer and pulled out the menu. She handed it to Danny and grabbed the phone. 

"Do they have hot dogs?"

Linda looked at him weirdly, "you do not order a hot dog in Italy. You order pastas like pasta e fasule or pasticcio or rigatoni!"

"Look," Danny pointed to the menu. "They have American hot dogs!"

"You have no theme or tradition in your soul."

"Just order me my hot dog. Make it two."

Linda rolled her eyes but dialed the room service number anyway. "Ciao, servizio in camera?... sì, mi piacerebbe i ravioli ai funghi. E due hot dog americani..... sì, sì, grazie." 

Linda hung up, "I got your hotdogs. Happy now?" 

"Why don't you speak Italian more?" Danny asked as she put the phone back on the table. 

"There's no need to speak Italian in New York. Sometimes I get Italian patients at the hospital, but they almost always speak English.... but let’s not talk about work. We’re here to relax, and until I have to get on that plane again, I am going to do nothing but relax.” She stressed the last words as she stretched and moved closer to her husband. She knew the trip would be a fun one.


	4. One More Thing...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not sure how this happened, but it has, and now this story is an official crossover with the lovable Columbo and his wife. 
> 
> Since we never know Mrs. Columbo’s name (I’m not using the sham of a tv show Mrs. Columbo aka Kate Loves A Good Mystery), I’m using the name Peter Falk used at Frank Sinatra’s roast: Rose

Linda couldn't deny the pounding in her chest, thudding loud in her ears. She was scared, but if a stranger came by, asking if she was lost, she'd lie to them. She'd tell them exactly what she was- a tourist looking at the beautiful city. She couldn't get a hold of him- her phone wasn't working. She'd call and it'd go directly to voice mail. She was not going to have a panic attack in the middle of the city, she wasn't going to do it. 

"Oh, excuse me, ma'am."

Linda turned around to see a short little man with white hair and a big, fat cigar. Before she could answer him, he started talking. 

"Um, uh... let's see here..." he flipped through a small little book, muttering to himself. 

"I speak English."

"Oh, that's great, that's fantastic.... say, you wouldn't happen to know the Italian for 'can you speak English', would you?"

"Oh, um... it's parla inglese."

"Thank you, thank you. You know, I saw you standing there, and I thought 'she looks like a nice lady', so I asked you how to say 'can you speak English'. But you don't sound very Italian, not at all. No, you sound like a New Yorker."

"I am from New York, yeah. My husband and I are here on a lovely vacation." 

"But you speak Italian rather nicely."

"Well, I'm from New York, but I'm of Italian decent."

"No kidding? So am I. Lieutenant Columbo," the strange little man held out his hand. "No, just Columbo now. They forced me to retire."

"I'm Linda. I thought you might have been a police man."

"Yeah, how can you tell? Is it the cigar?"

Linda laughed, he put her at ease. "See, I'm married to a detective, and all his family are cops and a lawyer. I guess you can say I can pick them out."

"Oh, that's nice. That's great; you've got a good eye. Where's your husband?"

"Oh, um..." and suddenly she remembered that panic attack that was setting up residency. "I don't know. I kinda lost him."

"I'll help you, if you help me. You help me look for my wife, and I'll help locate your husband."

Linda knew she shouldn't be going off with this stranger- he could be telling her lies. He could be an old perverted man. Something about him put her completely at ease, like she had known him all her life. Plus, she really did want to find Danny. "Okay, Columbo."

"Now, what does your husband look like?"

"He's five-ten, with hazel eyes and a fantastic smile. He has tan hair, and is wearing dark jeans and a red T-shirt. He's very handsome." 

Columbo smiled as they made their way slowly through the town. “You tried calling your husband?”

“My phone isn’t working. No reception or something.” She had tried calling him at least eight times, and every time she got voicemail. 

“Listen, you seem tense. You’re worried about something, about your husband.”

“Yes,” Linda admitted simply. She was worried about him, and about herself. What if she never found him?

“Linda!”

Linda’s head shot up at the familiar voice. “Danny!” They ran to each other, hugging tightly. “I’m sorry,” she quickly apologized. “I turned away for one second, and you were gone, and my phone isn’t working, and-“

“It’s okay,” Danny smoothed a hand over her hair. “It’s okay.” He pulled away and grabbed her hand, squeezing tightly. “We’ll just have to stick together better, that’s all.”

Linda nodded, feeling waves of relief wash over her. She sighs and laughs a little nervously, upset with herself over how upset she got. Danny would always find her- he swore that to her on their wedding day. 

Just then, Danny noticed Columbo smiling fondly at them. “Who’s this?”

“Oh, Danny, this is Lieutenant Columbo. He’s here on vacation, too.”

Columbo shook Danny’s hand, giving him a little nod, “nice to meet you.”

“Same here.”

“Listen, Danny, I kinda promised Columbo we’d help him find his wife.”

“My wife,” Columbo immediately jumped in, “she’s very beautiful, totally nuts. Whenever we go on trips, she always wanders off and gets lost.”

“Can we help him, Danny? We’ll still be able to see the city.”

Danny nodded, despite every instinct telling him ‘no’. “Sure. Have you had lunch yet, Lieutenant?” What possessed him to ask that question?

“Oh, no. No, I haven’t. My wife and I were going to this little boutique with hats and dresses and things.... when I lost her! I was standing, waiting for her, and then she was gone!”

“Where’s the boutique? She’s probably still there.” Linda suggested, realizing she should’ve stayed where she had been separated from Danny. 

“You’re probably right,” Columbo brought his hand to his forehead, looking dumbstruck. “She’s probably still there, waiting for me!”

“Once we find her, want to join us for lunch, Lieutenant?” Danny asked as they turned around, heading towards the boutique.

“I couldn’t impose on you lie that-“

“Nonsense!” Linda smiled at him, “what kind of person would I be if I didn’t get a fellow Italian lunch after he helped me find my husband? You’ll eat with us, you and your wife. By the way, what is your wife’s name?”

“Her name is Rose, but I sometimes like to call her Rosie.”

“No kidding?” Danny smirked, “Linda’s middle name is Rose.”

Columbo looked at Linda, smiling over at her. “You’re kidding.”

“No, my middle name really is Rose.”

“Well, what a coincidence.”

Danny and Linda shared smiles and small chuckles as Columbo indulged them in stories of his time on the force. The couple walked hand in hand, very intrigued by the small, old man. He told stories about his wife, his brother in law George, his kids, his cousin Vito, and his many, many Bassett hounds through the years. 

“Oh, this is it, this is it,” Columbo interrupted the story of how he got his most recent Bassett hound in order to point out the boutique. “This is the boutique.”

Danny held the door for Columbo and Linda, “then we’ll pop in, get Rose and Linda out of there before they can shop more-“

Linda shot him a dirty look, to which he smiled sweetly. 

“Then we’ll grab a nice lunch.”


	5. Lunch

"So she went crazy, killed her husband, and the guy who had a crush on her took the rap?" Linda asked as she, Danny, Columbo, and Rose waited for their lunches. "That is so sweet!"

"Sweet?" Danny looked at her, "babe, she killed her husband! That's not sweet- that's murder!"

"But her friend took the blame because he loved her! And his love for her and his want to protect her overpowered the thought of jail! That's very romantic."

"No, I don't see it." He shook his head. "Murder is murder."

"Danny, I'm not saying what she did was right or just. I'm saying what her friend did for her was incredibly sweet and very romantic."

"What about you?" Columbo interrupted, "what's been one of your more interesting cases?"

"There's been a lot.." Danny paused to think for a bit. "The one with the drag queens was very interesting."

"The tall redhead liked you!" Linda sang, smiling, knowing how uncomfortable Danny was through the whole case. 

He shuddered, getting laughter from around the table. Wanting to change the subject, he asked Mrs. Columbo, "while we were helping Columbo look for you, he was telling us about your hobbies."

"Oh yes," Rose nodded. "I have many hobbies. I like painting, collecting art pieces like vases, and of course, spoiling the kids and grandkids."

"A full time job," Linda agreed, raising her glass to her lips. "No grandkids yet."

"I just hope the boys find someone at least half as good as you," Danny gave his wife a flirtatious smile. 

"Aww!" She kissed him sweetly. 

"Is this a second honeymoon for you two?" Rose asked, gliding her hands on the table and leaning forward. 

"Oh no! Not yet," Linda answered. "No, that's way in October, and I don't know if we'll go as far as Italy... no, it's my birthday."

"Your birthday? It must be a doozy of a birthday, though you don't look a day over thirty five," Columbo noticed Linda's blush. "Or, Danny, you must love your wife very, very much."

"Oh, I do," he slung an arm around Linda. "I figured she's been around this long, might as well see it to the end."

"Stop!" Linda smacked him playfully on the chest. 

"How long have you been together?" Rose wondered. She could tell right off the bat that Danny and Linda had something very special. 

"Too long to think about," Linda mumbled, chuckling. "We were high school sweethearts-"

"So were we!" Columbo interrupted again. "I'd take Rosie out to the movies, and for ice cream, and a nice dinner at a fancy restaurant."

Linda had accidentally zoned out as Danny's hand started roaming her back before settling comfortably beneath the head of her summer tank top. She was glad the weather was nice that day; the sun was shining, and there was a very pleasant summer breeze that blew through every fifteen minutes or so. She was glad the only worry she would have the next five days was where to go and what to see. 

"-and my first hound dog- we never got around to naming him. We just called him Dog, because it didn't matter, he never came anyway. But he was the sweetest dog, needed lots of attention though."

Linda finally refocused, her mind thinking 'huh? How'd we get to dogs?'. But before she could ask, their food arrived. She smiled and thanked the waiter, eyeing her food like a hungry puppy. 

"Do you have any pets?" Columbo asked as he sprinkled Parmesan on his stuffed mushrooms. 

"No, we've always been too busy for a pet, sadly. No one's ever home to make sure he or she gets the proper care," Linda explained. "Those mushrooms look good."

"Oh, they are. They're fantastic."

Before Columbo could say anything further, Rose piped up, "at least you didn't order chili. He's always ordering chili, no matter where we are."

"Sounds like you, Danny. First thing he wanted to eat here was a hot dog. I say you can't eat hotdogs in Italy!"

The rest of lunch was filled with talk about food, kids, cases, and what the couples planned to do throughout the rest of the trip. 

"Well, Linda's birthday is on Sunday, and I was planning a beach day and some other fun things," Danny rubbed Linda's shoulder. "I think we're going to a museum tomorrow."

"Yeah, we are. I don't know about the rest of the trip; we've kinda just been bouncing from one spot to our hotel room to another spot."

"Maybe we'll bump into each other again," Rose suggested, gesturing to the younger couple. 

"Yeah, maybe. That'd be nice," Danny nodded, smiling at them. "We do have to get going, though, but here's the hotel we're staying at." He handed them a business card from the hotel. "Maybe we'll see each other later."

The couples bid each other goodbye before heading in opposite directions. "Danny," Linda started as he held her hand while walking somewhat quickly. "Why'd we leave so fast? I think Columbo wanted to keep talking about... things."

Danny turned into a small alleyway between two apartment buildings. He trapped his wife between him and the brick building. "Because this trip is about you and me. And I want you." He kissed her deeply, tasting the pasta lunch she had just eaten. 

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she asked seductively, "then what're you waiting for, Detective?" She captured his lips with hers, returning the searing kiss. If there was one thing Linda loved, it was teasing her husband; so her hand moved from his shoulder to his chest, lower and lower until he stopped her. 

"Better slow down," he grabbed her wrist, leading her out of the alleyway. He hailed a cab, and let Linda climb in first. 

At first, after they told the cab driver where they were headed, they were quiet and kept to themselves. Danny watched Linda push her hair back as she looked out the window. He leaned over and kissed her jawline, then titled his head towards her ear. He nibbled on the flesh, causing her eyes to flutter close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just remembered that this was supposed to be a smut story, not a cute crossover between two of my favorite shows. Therefore, smut will be coming


End file.
